Inspira Health Network, Inc.

SPR 2016

Spirit of Women magazine is a national publication presented to women by hospitals and their physicians. The magazine provides up-to-date, evidence-based healthcare information and promotes our hospitals as leaders in women's health excellence.

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2 3 w w w. s p i r i t o f w o m e n . c o m S P R I N G 2 016 S P I R I T O F W O M E N M E N T A L H E A L T H By Stephanie Thompson SHUTTERSTOCK and give rides or support but not cash. "It's important for families not to feel like they're handling an addicted family member 'wrong,'" says Gonzales. "If you can't let a family member be homeless, that's fine. It's fine too if you need to put medicine or valuables in a lockbox. Don't feel guilty about the decisions you've made." THE BIGGER PICTURE When you're dealing with a family member's addiction, it's also a good time to look at your family's history and acceptable norms for substances and behaviors, since addictions tend to run in families. Being open about addiction issues in your family is hard, but it can also lead to sharing information about resources in your community that can help, such as Al-Anon or Nar- Anon. These groups can aid families in working through the emotions and the physical realities of coping with an addicted person. And don't feel guilty about caring for yourself when another family member is in need. "If you try to take care of someone else before taking care of yourself, you will simply become depleted and exhausted," says Candace Plattor, a registered clinical counselor in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. • W hen an extended family member is addicted to something dangerous, whether it's a substance or a behavior, it can be difficult to find a balance between supporting him or her and protecting your own nuclear family. The most important thing to remember, says Lisa Gonzales, an addictions counselor with Christiana Care Health System in Wilmington, Del., is to be honest, to not feel guilty—and to seek professional help. "When families are dealing with someone with an addiction, often [the family] can become suspicious and have a lot of anger and trust issues, and it can change who they are as people," says Gonzales. Families often deny the issues surrounding the addicted person as a result of shame, isolating themselves from friends and community, but "it's so important to put an end to the secrecy and admit what's happening," she adds. FACING THE TRUTH An addict suffers from a chemical and biological problem that prevents him or her from stopping a behavior despite seriously negative consequences. "Addiction is a brain disorder, not a moral weakness," says Gonzales. So while you ideally would support an addicted family member with his or her recovery efforts, it's important to make a united family plan to set boundaries and avoid enabling the person's addiction or becoming codependent. "Family members will think, 'If I do this or that, they'll get better,'" says Gonzales, but that's often not the case. The best your family can do is talk to each other and the addicted person openly about what you will and won't do: avoid keeping alcohol or pain medication around, for example, Where to fnd help • Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration http://www.samhsa.gov / 800-622-HELP • Alcoholics Anonymous / http://www.aa.org • Narcotics Anonymous / https://www.na.org Protecting your from the aftermath of addiction family

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